Monday, 8 May 2017

I first drafted this post up back in November 2015, I had just done my letter to my 15 year old self (even though I didn't publish it until January)

This one seemed a lot more difficult to write. What did I really want to say to my 25 year old self?

Its easy to write back to when I was 15 because thats happened, I've literally been there done that. But 25 year old me? No idea. 

I really thought a lot about what I want my future to look like. The idea of my future always looks so different, and can I really expect myself to have my shit together in 4 years time? Not so sure, and that's fine.

Its like when you're little and all the big kids look soon grown up and you feel like you're going to be little forever. Then when you get to your teens and everyone in their twenties most certainly have everything in place and are so wise. Then when you hit 21 and you're like oh no wait nobody actually knows what the fuck is going on, they're winging it too. 

Anyway, here is my letter to my 25 year old self, enjoy. 

Dear 25 Year Old Beth,

As 21 year old Beth, you are currently having a bit of a tough time. You are still in your job in retail and well, you're not loving it.
You are on the verge of making some pretty big life changing decisions, you're excited but also understandably scared.
You need to take a leap of faith, and I hope with my whole heart that you did. 

You're coming to realise that people can be mean, and not everyone is going to be around for forever, no matter how many times you promise to love someone for that long.

A broken heart is something you have been trying to fix. It's been hard but you are stronger for it. In difficult times, people will show you the best and worst of themselves, hold onto those good people, they make your soul happy. 

Writing is your favourite thing at the moment, and you want to get better at photography. 

Anxiety is still a huge weight on your shoulders but slowly but surely you are getting there. 

You are currently spending most of your time with friends, be that a catch up over a cup of tea, or going to the pub quiz, there is a lot of laughter. 

Life is tricky and you wish you had a plan and some guidelines of what you're meant to be doing.

I hope you make the right decisions and didn't settle for an easy but unfulfilled life. 

At 25, you are not far away, but in the next few years I hope I make you proud.

I just hope that you are happy.

All my hope and love, 

21 Year Old Beth xxx

I wonder if I will look back on pictures of myself at this ages and be like oh my god why did you wear your hair like that, why are you wearing that??? Much like I do when I look back on 15 year old me. But it is so exciting to see how much has changed. I feel so naive looking forward because I know so much is going to change, I really have no idea what's going to happen.

I hope I will still be blogging when I am 25 and I can write my next letter to my 30 year old self, holy shit, 30 seems like a long way away!

I hope you enjoyed this and if you want to do the same and write a letter to your future self I would love to read it.

See you soon, Beth xxx

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